Tuesday, September 27, 2011

"It's just good business."

"You're mad." "Thank goodness for that, because if I wasn't this would probably never work."
Cutler Beckett and Jack Sparrow[
 Its Just good business, famous last words of our beloved evil short man; Lord Cutler Beckett. Who just happens to be in control of the 'East India Trading Company', the biggest hater of pirates in all of Great Britain. It doesn't seem like he and Jack would get along very well does it.? Well Jack does his best to ruin Cutler Beckett and in the end he succeeds. But not without a little evil planning and partnerships that always fail first.

"Curious...your friends appear to be quite desperate, Jack. Perhaps they no longer believe that a gathering of squabbling pirates can defeat the Flying Dutchman. And so despair leads to betrayal. But you and I are no strangers to betrayal, are we?"
―Cutler Beckett to Jack Sparrow[
After making an agreement with Lord Beckett, Jack is summoned to the Brethren Court meeting at shipwreck cove. During this meeting Jack and the Court decide to fight...the entire British Navy. An interesting decision coming from a bunch of cowardly pirates. But they have a few tricks up their sleeves as usual.
While Jack and the Brethren Court was planning their strategy, Lord Beckett was scolding Davy Jones. Beckett was in possession of a very valuable organ. The heart of Davy Jones. If Beckett stabbed said heart Davy Jones would perish and Lord Beckett would be in control of the ship and crew of Davy Jones, But thats not all; he would also be in control of the sea itself.

"The Dutchman sails as its captain commands." "And its captain is to sail it as commanded. I would have thought you'd learned that when I ordered you to kill your pet. This is no longer your world, Jones. The immaterial has become...immaterial."
Davy Jones and Cutler Beckett
 Two day later the Navy of Great Britain and all the Ships of the Brethren Court met in the middle of the ocean, an began a battle one that would decide the fate of the ocean an all the ships that sailed her glorious waters. Out come the bag of tricks. The brethren court released A goddess that had been captured and placed in human form, we know her as Tia DaAlma; But her former lover Davy Jones knows her as Calypso goddess of the sea and everything in it. Her heart had been broken many years ago, by Davy Jones and this was her chance to get revenge. She fought on neither side; but the waves she controlled eventually helped the Brethren Court defeat Lord Beckett and Davy Jones. IN the end, The black Pearl blasted Lord Beckett's ship to pieces and sent hm to his watery grave.
 "It's just...good business."
―Cutler Beckett's last words

Monday, September 26, 2011


Elizabeth Sparrow?
Doesn't sound right.
Scarlet Sparrow?
Um, NO!

Giselle Sparrow?
Absolutely not.

Jack Sparrow?

Jack is an original, spunky, smart, clever, insane, (often) drunk, loony, hot, and single pirate who won't let anything tie him down from the thing he loves the most: being a pirate!  True, Jack likes to be a flirt, but he never lets a girl get between him and the sea.  Of course, somtimes that leads him into some trouble.

Jack: "Scarlet!"
Scarlet slaps him
Jack: "I'm not sure I deserved that.  Giselle!"
Giselle: "Who was she?"
Jack: "What?"
Giselle slaps him.
Jack: "I may have deserved that."
-The Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl

Oh Jack and his women?  These crazy women waiting for revenge in the lovely city of Tortuga.  Who can really blame them for slapping him though?  Wouldn't you be sad and angry if the most amazing person in you're life broke your heart?

"Please shut it!!! yes, I lied to you. no, I don't love you. of course it makes you look fat! I've never been to Brussels. It is pronounced "egregious" and by the way, I've never met Pizzarro but I love his pies. and all of this pales to utter insignificance in light of the fact that my ship is once again gone. savvy?"
Hurtful much?

And let's not forget Angelica, but we think she's somewhat of a different story...

"I really rather hoped that we were past all this."

Barbossa: How the blazes did you get off that island?
Jack Sparrow: When you marooned me on that god forsaken spit of land, you forgot one very important thing, mate: I'm Captain Jack Sparrow.

A long time ago; the crew of the Black Pearl was a greedy lot, always on the hunt for a bigger and better treasure then what they already had. after searching for sometime they stumbled upon the cursed gold of the ancient Aztecs; after marooning Jack on an island; being the idiots that they are; the crew spent all the gold. Of course they didn't know it was cursed. but they sure found out fast. Said curse made them immortal and had several other side effects; Barbossa: For too long I've been parched of thirst and unable to quench it. Too long I've been starving to death and haven't died. I feel nothing. Not the wind on my face nor the spray of the sea. Nor the warmth of a woman's flesh. 
 10 years later; Jack finds Captain Barbossa hatches a plan. An epic battle took place that day between Hector Barbossa and Captain Jack Sparrow; One that involved fighting, bombs, apples and many  other villain type things. Barbossa and Jack lock swords in a duel that could end in only one thing; death.

Barbossa: You can't beat me, Jack!
[In reply, Jack stabs him with his sword. Barbossa simply sighs, pulls the blade out of his body and stabs Jack with it. He smiles as Jack totters - but is shocked when a shaft of moonlight turns Jack into a cursed skeleton of his former self... ]
Jack Sparrow: [examining his new form] That's interesting...
Jack Sparrow: [an Aztec coin dancing on his fingers] I couldn't resist, mate...

But little did they know they are both immortal. So how is one of them going to die you might ask, well insert Jack's sidekick Will turner, who just at the right moment Slices his arm while Jack is shooting Barbossa and lifts the curse, thus ending the duel and Barbossa's life, (only for a little bit though)


Thursday, September 22, 2011

"Welcome to the Caribbean, love."

 After trying and failing to control his crew, Captain Jack Sparrow and Elizabeth Swann were marooned on an island. Previously Jack had been left on this same island after Barbossa lead a mutiny aboard the Black Pearl years many ago. This is how they (the crew) thought that he escaped; "How did Jack get off the island?"
"Well, I'll tell ye. He waded out into the shallows, and he waited there three days and three nights, till all manner of sea creatures came acclimatin' to his presence. Then on the fourth morning, he roped himself a couple of sea turtles, lashed 'em together and made a raft!"
"He roped a couple of sea turtles?"
"Aye, sea turtles!
Sounds like Jack doesn't it? Well he didn't actually do that. He was rescued by Rum dealers.(who else would let that crazy man on their ship)

So how are Jack on Elizabeth going to get off you might ask. After seducing Jack in to a drunken sleep, Elizabeth commits a heinous act of complete villainy. She burns the rum. Oh that got Jack into quite a fit.

"'Must have been terrible for you to be trapped here, Jack. Must have been terrible for you'—Well it bloody is now!"

Eventually they are rescued But unfortunately for Jack; "There will be no living with her after this." 

 But thats not the end of Jack and Elizabeth. She commits on more act of complete and total villainy.....She kills him...well all she did was kiss him really and then handcuff him to a poll sealing his fate forever, all right in front of her one true love Will Turner. But we know Jack, He doesn't stay dead for long.    

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

"We must fight…to run away."

"Cuttlefish. Eh? Let us not, dear friends, forget our dear friends, the cuttlefish. Flipper glorious little sausages. Pen'em up together and they will devour each other without a second thought. Human nature, isn't it? Or...or fish nature. So yes, we could hole up here, well provisioned and well armed, and half of us would be dead within the month, which quite seems grim to me any way you slice it. Or...uhhh...as my...learned colleague so naively suggests, we can release Calypso, and we can pray that she will be merciful—I rather doubt it. Can we, in fact, pretend that she is anything other than a woman scorned, like which fury Hell hath no? We cannot. Res ipsa loquitur, tabula in naufragio, we are left but with one option. I agree with, and I cannot believe the words that are coming out of me mouth...Captain Swann. We must fight.  --Jack Sparrow 

 Well well, Jack being brave? What is Going on?  Jack is staying to fight he entire British Navy, and agreeing with Elizabeth. He must of had to much rum! After they (the brethren court) decide to fight, Barbossa goes behind Jack's back and releases Calypso, this does end up working, but staying and fighting helped too right? Well of course it did! While fight the powers of Calypso and the Navy; Jack and his crew defeat Davy Jones and stab the heart, will almost dies and the Navy is destroyed by Calypso. So staying helped right? But only because they had the one, the only Captain Jack Sparrow. Savvy?

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

"I'm Dishonest"

In this scene of The Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl, Jack rambles on to Barbossa in the Isle de Muerta.  "Me? I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest, honestly.  It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly stupid."

You kinda have to break down this quote to complete get what the heck Jack is saying.  Basically, he says that he's predictably unpredictable, so one knows never to trust him.  Honest people, however, make you think that their honest, and then deceive you once the have your trust.  Barbossa should have listened to Jack's "words of wisdom" carefully, because right after he is done speaking, Jack pulls out his sword and begins to fight Barbossa again.

Jack takes many twists and turns in only that one movie.  First, he goes out with will to "find" Elizabeth.  When he reaches the Black Pearl and the crew, he planned to trade off Will in exchange of the ship.  Once he was caught, left on the island with Elizabeth, and returns to "save" Will and "defeat the Black Pearl".  Once he's inside the caves talking to Barbossa and his crew, he tells them to go fight the Royal Navy with the curse so that they may not die.  He convinces them to then take the navy ship for Barbossa, and Jack asks to sail the Pearl under his name.  Barbosa agrees.  Will then speaks his words of wisdom and begins fighting Barbossa, before revealing to him that he has also become immortal by taking the gold.  In the end, he ends up on Will and Elizabeth's side.  For now, that is.  Who knows what is to come with such a dishonest man like Captain Jack Sparrow?

Monday, September 19, 2011

"You Are Well On Your Way to Becoming one"

In The Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl, Jack shares some words of wisdom with Will.  
Jack: "You know, for having such a bleak outlook on pirates you are well on your way to becoming one: sprung a man from jail, commandeered a ship of the fleet, sailed with a buccaneer crew out of Tortuga, and you're completely obsessed with treasure."
Will: "That's not true.  I am not obsessed with trasure." 
Jack: "Not all treasure is silver and gold, mate."

Wow.  That's a lot to take in as you're rowing a boat through some mysterious caves.  Jack certainly did turn Will into quite the pirate.  Well, it was Will who came to pursue Jack in the jail to ask him for help in finding Elizabeth, which brings us to another point.  Will's treasure may not be silver and gold, but he is somewhat obsessed with Elizabeth.

Will Turner used to be a middle-class blacksmith living in Port Royal with a fantasy of someday marrying the governor's daughter and a hatred towards any pirate who landed on the little island.  Little did he know that the day he wondered into his shop and found Jack would change the rest of his life.  With out Jack, he never would have saved Elizabeth or have been reunited with his father.  Although he may not want to admit it, Will's life has changed for the better all because of one crazy pirate: Captain Jack Sparrow.

Saturday, September 17, 2011

"CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow"

Town Clerk: "Jack Sparrow." 
Jack: "Captain... Captain Jack Sparrow."
Town Clerk: "...for your willful commission of crime against the crown. Those crimes being numerous in quantity and sinister in nature..."
-Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl

Governor Swan: "The charge is conspiring to save a man convicted of crimes against the crown and emperor and condemned to death for which the..."
Lord Beckett: "For which the punishment is regrettably is also death.  Perhaps you remember a certain pirate named Jack Sparrow."
Elizabeth and Will: "CAPTAIN!"
Elizabeth: "Captain Jack Sparrow."
Lord Beckett: "Captain Jack Sparrow.  Yes I thought you might." 
-Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest

Jack: “The Immortal Captain Jack Sparrow. It has such a lovely ring to it…"
-Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End

Guard: "Are you the real Jack Sparrow?"
Jack: "There should be a Captain in there somewhere."
-Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides

In every movie, someone always manages to get it wrong!  What is it going to take people to realize that he owns a ship?  I mean, haven't you ever seen the Black Pearl?  It's amazing!  His captainess means so much to Jack.  Can't people ever just abide to his wishes?  Even as he's waiting to be hung, he complains about how he wishes for people to call him by his true potential: Captain.  Will anyone agree to his final wishes?

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

"Where is it? Where's the thump-thump?"

After searching long and hard for the key to the chest, Jack Sparrow and Co. finally found the chest that contained Davy Jones heart. after a long duel with James Norrington and Will Turner, Jack captured the key and regained control over the heart, and then preceded to lose it...Again.

He has control

He thinks he has control

He lost control

"I'll handle this, mate. Oi, fish-face! Lose something? Eh? Scungilli! [Mis-steps, falls down the stairs] Got it! Come to negotiate, eh, have you, you slimy git?! Look what I've got. [sing-song voice] I've got a jar of dirt! I've got a jar of dirt! And guess what's inside it!" [dumps out the jar of dirt]   "Where is it? Where's the thump-thump?" --Jack Sparrow 

Monday, September 12, 2011

"Do you think he plans it all out or makes it up as he goes along?"

Throughout his journeys Captain Jack Sparrow has not only left a trail of women but a trail of confused, annoyed, and shipless men. Including English; navy, merchants, a eventually the king of England himself. Making it seem easy to escape, evade and beat the english navy isn't his only task; He is always on the search for the next treasure to find, the next woman to smite, and the next  bottle of rum to drink.
"I used practice three hours a day so that when I met a pirate, I could kill it! Well now i am a Pirate. "  ----Will turner to Jack Sparrow \

"Gentlemen, m'lady; you will always remember this as the day that you almost caught Captain Jack Sparrow!"
―Jack Sparrow to Royal Navy soldiers
"Mr. Gibbs!" "Cap'n." "We have our heading." "Finally!"
―Jack Sparrow and Joshamee Gibbs

Sunday, September 11, 2011

"...and a captain who is clearly mad?"

The crew of the 'Black Pearl' have faced some very interesting situations with their Captain. Including becoming almost completely frozen, battling fish people, battling half dead people, and sailing around the world in search of a heading. Don't you feel for them even a little bit? But hey they always finish the rum, so they deserve it right?

" We are not among the living and so we cannot die."--Barbossa and his crew while he was captain of the black pearl.
Jack Sparrow to his new crew -  Do you have the courage and fortitude to follow orders and stay true in the face of danger and almost certain death? 

"What about Jack!? I won't leave without him!"
"...Time to go.
--Will turner and Gibbs

Friday, September 9, 2011

"Look! An undead monkey. Top that!"

Where ever He goes; Jack Sparrow always has a woman waiting for Him. Occasionally they are actually happy to see him. One of these woman happens to be Tia Dalma/Cylipso, a crazy blue lipped Caribbean woman who read palms and trows bones and is great friends with our beloved Captain Jack Sparrow.-------------------------------

"Dirt... . This is a jar of dirt."--Jack
"Yes." -Tia Dalma
"Is the jar of dirt going to help?" --Jack
"If you don't want it, give it back."--Tia Dalma
"No." -Jack
"Then it helps." --Tia Dalma

―Tia Dalma and Jack Sparrow...


"Would you do it? Hm? What would you…hm? What would any of you be willing to do, hm? Would you sail to the ends of the Eart' and beyond, to fetch back witty Jack and him precious Pearl?"
--Tia Dalma to Jack Sparrow's crew

Thursday, September 8, 2011

"A Wedding? I Love Weddings! Drinks All Around!"

Like just about every pirate, Jack loves rum.

What is his initial reaction to Elizabeth accepting James Norrington's hand in marriage in The Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl?  "A wedding? I love weddings! Drinks all around!"  Well, what a better subject to discuss and lighten the mood than alcohol, am I right?  Lets not forget that as he rejoices of drinking, he's handcuffed (as he usually is in the movies.  How does he manage to be handcuffed half the time and a hero all the time?)

How about some more memorable moments?
Jack: "Why is the rum always gone?"
(Gets up and stumbles a bit)
Jack: "That's why."
-Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest

Jack: "Stop! Stop! Not Good!  What are you doing? You burned all the food... the shade... THE RUM!"
Elizabeth: "Yes, the rum is gone."
Jack: "Why is the rum gone?"
Elizabeth: "One, because it is a vile drink that turns even the most respectable men into beasts and scandals!  And two, that signal is over a thousand feet high.  The entire royal navy is out looking for me. Do you really think that there is even the slightest chance that they won't see it?"
Jack: "But why is the rum gone?"
-Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl

Is there really a bigger picture anywhere besides rum for Jack?  Well, with a bottle or with out, we sure do love jack, am I right?