Sunday, November 27, 2011

"All Part Of The Plan I Assume?"

"I've heard of you. And you know who I am."
"Face is familiar, have I threatened you before?"

George II and Jack Sparrow

Oh Jack what have you gotten yourself into this time? 
Handcuffed to a chair in the King's dining room surrounded by guards and appetizing food maybe?Not exactly the likeliest place. However he gets out of that room quickly, just in time to run in to his impersonator who of course is in a bar.

You've stolen me, and I'm here to steal myself back." --Jack
An impersonator who just happens to be one of Jack's many former lovers. But this one is just a teensy bit different"I was ready to take my vows! And you—what were you doing in a Spanish Convent, anyway?!"
"Mistook it for a brothel. Honest mistake."        Bad move Jack. After a touching reunion (in which Jack almost gets his butt kicked by a girl) They move on and get down to the important stuff. "I could use a ship..." " I just happen to be in possession of one."   But does she really? 

When he wakes up on a hammock in the  quarters onboard Black-Beards ship " The Queen Anne's Revenge", he finds out the truth of this interesting situation.  Angelica is supposedly Blackbeard's daughter and is currently the first mate. Well how cool is that? Not very. After trying and failing to stage a mutiny Jack begins to figure out how to help himself stay safe on what looks to be quite an interesting voyage.

Monday, November 21, 2011

"We Named the Monkey Jack"

Barbossa: "Why thank you Jack."
Jack: "You're welcome."
Barbossa: "Not you, we named the monkey Jack."

Awkward much?

In this scene of The Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl, Captain Jack Sparrow chases Jack, the monkey, around in attempt to prevent the monkey from giving Barbossa the final madallion.  After quite an adventure the monkey gives his master the Aztec gold.  Jack looses; But he still has his pride!  Until Barbossa tells him that the monkey is named after him, making Jack look like an animal and sort of full of himself.

So that is kinda awkward because Jack thinks Barbossa is talking to him, but in reality Barbossa would rather be talking to a filthy monkey.

Jack does like to monkey around, but he doesn't look much like one!  Do you see any simalarities?

If Jack were a monkey, I'd want him to be my little monkey, But I hate that monkey.  

Monday, November 7, 2011

"Him Heart"

So what lead up to Davy Jones being a fish face you might ask. Well he fell in love; .Tia Dalma: You know of Davy Jones? A man of the sea, a great sailor. Until he run afoul of that which vexes all men. Will Turner: What vexes all men? Tia Dalma: What indeed. Gibbs: The sea? Pintel: Sums? Ragetti: The dichotomy of good and evil? Jack Sparrow: A woman. Tia Dalma: A woman. He fell in love. Gibbs: No, no, I heard it was the sea he fell in love with. Tia Dalma: [annoyed] Same story, different versions. And all are true. See, it was a woman as changing and harsh and untamable as the sea. Him never stopped loving her. But the pain it caused was to much to live with, but not enough to cause him to die. Will Turner: What exactly did he put into the chest? Tia Dalma: Him heart. Ragetti: Literally or figuratively? Pintel: He couldn't literally put his heart in a chest. Could he?
Tia Dalma: It was not worth feeling what small, fleeting joy life brings. 

A women? But he is a pirate! How could he betray what should be his only love the sea? 
Quite simply actually; His love is the goddess of he sea Calypso. Calypso was captured by the very first brethren court and trapped into the human form that became Tia Dalma. She has been helping pirates like Jack for years. She's even brought back pirates from the dead. But she has never stopped love Davy Jones. 
 "Ten years I devoted to the duty you charged me. Ten years I looked after those who died at sea. And finally, when we could be together again…you weren't there! Why weren't you there?" "It's my nature. Would you love me if I was anything but what I am?" "I do not love you." Unfortunately the feeling is no longer mutual.  However as Davy Jones is dying he utters one final word..."Calypso" This leads me to believe that his love for her never has and never will die.

Sunday, November 6, 2011

"Cruel is a matter of perspective."

Our dear old Jack has returned from the dead. Much to the chagrin of Davy Jones; who lost his "little pet" the kraken because of it. After the meeting of The Brethren Court who elected Captain Elizabeth Swann as there king; Jack, Barbossa and Elizabeth had a meeting with Lord Beckett and Davy Jones and they discuss whether to fight or to end the argument right there. Pirates will be pirates and they decided to stick it out and fight of course. But Jack and Davy will meet again...very soon.  

"Ha ha…Lookie here, boys.  A lost bird that never learned to fly." "To my great regret. But it's never too late to learn!"--Davy Jones and Jack Sparrow

 During the last fight between Lord Beckett's British Navy and the Brethren Court's fleet; Jack and Davy lock in an epic battle for the chest that contains the heart of Dacy Jones and controls the fates of many men.

One of said fates belongs to a very special man; Will Turner. After   saving his recent wife Elizabeth's life, Will Gets stabbed in the chest by    Davy Jones. But his life is saved by the illustrious Jack Sparrow. In the end the good guys won, and Jack defeated the great Davy Jones. However Will only gets to see his beloved wife every ten years, but they make the best of it.


Friday, November 4, 2011

As you were, gents.

Jack and Will are on the hunt or a crew; But of course they need a first mate. Insert Mr. Gibbs, Jack's most faithful and closest friend. They find him drunk and sleeping in a pig-pen. But hey, thats the life of a pirate right? So after some thought they wake him up, with whatever is closest, and that happened to be two buckets of water." Mr. Gibbs: Curse you for breathin' ya slack-jawed idiot. Mother's love. Jack. You should know better than to wake a man when he's sleepin'. Its bad luck. Jack Sparrow: Fortunately, I know how to counter it; the man who did the waking buys the man who was sleeping a drink; the man who was sleeping drinks it while listening to a proposition from the man who did the waking. Mr. Gibbs: Aye, that'll about do it. [Will throws more water on Mr. Gibbs] Mr. Gibbs: Blast! I'm already awake! Will Turner: That was for the smell." This begins the search for the toughest and craziest crew to ever sail the seven seas.

Now where would a pirate like Jack go to look for a crew you might ask; well where else. a bar of course! The crew that they found consisted of some very interesting men, and to Gibbs chagrin women. This particular woman hated Jack. Big surprise there. However Jack quickly smoothed things with her by promising her a ship at the end of there journey. And so the journey begins

This crew stayed with him for the many journeys, but more then once left him to die all because of that dreaded pirate code. When on an Island with some crazy cannibals The crew  and Will escaped; unfortunately Jack fell behind and almost missed the boat. The second time wasn't entirely their fault. That blasted Elizabeth girl handcuffed him to the main mast of the boat and sealed his fate. 

  A fate that included being eaten by a monster with rather smelly breath. However Jack's crew came to his rescue and brought him back to life, however he didn't go willingly with them at first, but they convinced him and brought him back (using his ship) like any good crew would. 

Thursday, November 3, 2011

"Idiot. He has nowhere to go but back to the noose!"

After some interesting altercations with the British Navy, Jack Sparrow is captured and is preparing to be hung, Will Turner is wearing some crazy hat and Elizabeth Swann (Turner) is engaged to James Norrington. My oh my what a great opportunity to embarrass some one and escape death!

Jack is all ready to be hung and is being read his charges;"Town Clerk: Jack Sparrow.
Jack Sparrow: Captain... Captain Jack Sparrow.
Town Clerk: ...for your willful commission of crime against the crown. Those crimes being numerous in quantity and sinister in nature...
Elizabeth: This is wrong...
Governor Swann: Commodore Norrington is bound by the law, as are we all.
Town Clerk: ...impersonating an officer of the Royal Navy; impersonating a clergy of the Church of England...
Jack Sparrow: Oh yeah, heh heh hehAll of a sudden Will shows up in his hat, and a parrot we all know flies by. Hmm something must be going on....right? Well of course! 

 The trapdoors under the gallows drop out and Jack is hanging between life and death but good 'ole Will throws his sword for jack to balance on and saves his partners life. but come on the area is surrounded by the Royal British Navy and there is know way out. 

But oh wait what about that Elizabeth girl? Right on time she springs into action and "faints" distracting her fiance for just the fight amount of time, and Jack forms a plan. And of course it works. He And Will end up unsurrouned by Royal Navy officers and prepare to jump off the cliff but they can't leave with out jack having his final word.
"Well, I'm actually feeling rather good about this. I think we've all arrived at a very special place, eh? Spiritually...Ecumenically...Grammatically? I want you to know that I was rooting for you, mate. Know that.
Elizabeth. It would never have worked between us darling...I'm sorry. Will...nice hat. Friends. This is the day that you will always remember as the day that—[Falls off]"

Oh wait what about the love of Will's life; Elizabeth? Will she choose to live the posh life with Norrington, or the rough and tumble life of a pirate with Will? Well duh, she follows her heart and chooses Will. "So, this is the you've chosen, is it? After all, he is a blacksmith." "No. He's a pirate."―Weatherby Swann and Elizabeth Swann/Turner  
    But of course Norrington had something to say about that  "I thought we might endure some ill-conceived escape attempt, but not from you."(to Will)  "On our return to Port Royal, I granted you clemency. And this is how you thank me? By throwing in your lot with him? He's .a pirate!"(to Lizzie) "And a good man."―James NorringtonAnd Elizabeth Swann/Turner  failed escape. But she sticks to her guns and stays with Will

            And so the trio lives to pirate another day.